My comments this morning are directed at men and the need for men to step up and become real leaders at home and at church. First, if you’re a man who doesn’t think of yourself as a leader, think again.  You are a leader—that’s how God created you.

So you’re already a leader and there is nothing you can do about that.  It’s just a question of how you are leading.  If you’re sitting back and just letting things happen, then you are trying to shirk your God-given responsibility as a leader.  So the first thing we must do as men is accept our roles as leaders in our families and within the church.  Just because we are failing to lead does not mean we’re not leaders—we’re just very poor leaders. So once you accept the fact you are a leader whether you wish it or not, you can begin to ask God to make you a great leader.

Now a few pointers from a man who is a leader, complete with some mistakes he has made along the way.  I hope the mistakes I have made will help you avoid them as you become a true leader at home and at church. Leaders realize they must also be led.  We are not lone wolves, but rather we are leaders who must take solid direction from the one we follow—Jesus Christ. Leaders become great when they realize they are also called to serve.

We do not lord our authority over those we lead; rather we sacrifice for them when necessary, putting their needs ahead of our desires. Leaders realize we will make mistakes.  We have no ego about making perfect decisions every time, and we humble ourselves before God and those we lead when we do make mistakes. Leaders practice what we preach.  We must not tell others how to live their lives and then violate our own teachings.  We lose all credibility when we put ourselves above our own teachings. Leaders must be humble and willing to learn from those we serve.

The day we think we have become perfect leaders, God will humble us in a hurry.  Look no further than Saul or David to see how God humbles leaders who begin to believe their own press clippings. Leaders take the time and effort to build up future leaders who will be better than we are.  We help them learn from our successes and failures and invest in them. Leaders desire wisdom and discernment from God.  We do not push our human agenda, but rather we serve only God’s agenda.  We make sure that He alone gets all glory and that every decision we make honors Him.

Leaders act the same in private as they do in public—they have spiritual integrity.  Leaders do not make decisions of convenience, sacrificing the future for short term gain.  They always have the end results in mind. Leaders know where they are leading others—and that destination is not where we think others should go, but rather where God wants them to go. Leaders realize we will be held to higher standards than those we lead—and we welcome the added scrutiny.

When leaders are held accountable, we do not get defensive or haughty—we embrace the rebuke as an opportunity to learn and become a better leader. What I have just shared comes from a man who has made plenty of mistakes as a leader, and it might scare you a little bit.  You may think you would rather just sit the game out and follow, rather than lead.  But truthfully, you are only fooling yourself.  God ordained men as leaders and we cannot simply walk away from our responsibility because it seems difficult.  The quicker you realize you have no choice but to be a leader—and that your current lack of godly leadership reflects you are currently a poor leader—the quicker you can open your heart and mind to God, allowing Him to make you a great leader. Men, our families and churches are in a mess because we have tried to ignore God’s calling on our lives as leaders.

It’s time to stand up and embrace the challenges of leadership, before it is too late.  You will make mistakes—and with God’s help you will learn from those mistakes.  Lead well by serving well.  Love, cherish and protect your wife and children.  And love your local church enough to get involved as a leader.  In these trying days our families and churches need real godly leaders, not men just along for the ride. We will all stand before God one day and give account for what we have done with the leadership positions He has given us.  God has made us leaders—it’s about time we started acting like leaders—godly leaders dedicated to His agenda, no matter the cost.

  • Leadership thoughts from King David and King Solomon (